letter to mandarin
Friday 4 May 2007 | I like a cookie
Hey peanut,
Congrats again—you must be over the moon! Tempting indeed to insert a random giraffe, no? [Into her nearly finished MSW thesis, in the hopes that no one will notice.] My fingers are crossed that your editor is a sharp one with a keen eye for M$Word formatting issues. (In fact my first SF freelance job was reformatting a long incomprehensibly scientific document for a consulting company when its authors had experienced just this problem. Its authors were Alain and the Physicist….) Alors, a modest gift-like object wings its way to you as of a day or so ago, which present has been waiting in abeyance for just such a moment of completion. Et voilà!
I think last night’s horror was actually a combo of full-blown menstruation (some days early) and possibly—Ambien withdrawal? Could that happen after a mere week? I suspect so—I was twitching and scribbling like St. Vitus’ fool, and it wasn’t entirely voluntary but it wasn’t exactly involuntary either. I shivered and trembled and rolled around and wrestled with the bedclothes and about 7 am fell into an absolutely exhausted sleep which contained pizza dreams of an out-of-control-party, starring seemingly every person I’ve ever known, including you, Stefania, and the Physicist’s and my next-door neighbors from Watermelon Street. Today, gorrammit, I fill my Lunesta prescription, though the Cool Psychiatrist warns me it will almost certainly leave me with “a bad taste” in my mouth. “What kind of bad taste?” asks the Brujo interestedly. “Like, cat poop?” “I don’t know yet,” I say with asperity, and remind him that anyway his dog loves cat poop. Beauty is in the tongue of the betaster.
On the plus side I finished both The Cloud of Unknowing and The Secret of the Golden Flower sometime around three a.m. Then I proceeded to have a big old anti-State School, pro-Pacifica moment; but I think it has passed, along with the unshakable, burning conviction that I should have ordered the blue pen.
And now I shower, dress, and go into the world in quest of a non-addictive drug that will make me SLEEP. Not just sleep but SLEEP, you know?
MORE HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY LOVE!
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